I have never met anyone on earth who has never been through a hard time. Most of us do not like showing our pain. Sometimes it is out of shame, sometimes is it out of hurt. What should we do in moments of despair? Do we have the power to overcome issues in our life?

Learn how to deal with it

You probably don’t think much about yourself, but that’s okay, as most people did not grow up with parents who taught them self-confidence and therefore they had to learn it the hard way. At some point an event happened, maybe several in a row. They had a tremendous impact on their lives and they were not prepared to deal with it. They do not know who to go to, and how much that person is insofar able to help. The truth is no one is ever prepared enough for life’s terrible events. You have to accept them if you cannot change them but do not let them change you and make you bitter.

Freedom of conscience

The most important principle of this world is freedom. All human beings are free. Each of us is free to choose. This is the reason that the world is what it is. Some people will choose to live in a self-centered way, some others will dedicate their lives to serve others. The words yes and no exist for a purpose, and we must use them appropriately.

In 1944, the French Philosopher Sartre wrote “we have never been so free as under the German Occupation.” This means that even under the worst political regime, no one on earth can force you to believe things you do not want to. Although the world will always make you believe the opposite, you actually have the choice to say no. No power is too strong to lead to infinite darkness. You can reject bad influences and overcome bad addictions.

No matter if it is social pressure or family pressure, you choose to live your way – as long as you do not harm anyone. You know better than anyone else what you want. Do not study what your Dad wants you to study. Do not marry the guy your Mom wants you to marry. Do not date the girl your friend wants you to date. Be yourself: this is the best gift you can make to this world. Face the giants: this is your life!

Mind your business

Do not let other people’s choices and mistakes ruin your own life. It is already enough to make decisions for yourself. If you have to carry all the burdens of the world on your shoulders, you will never make it. It does not matter what your grand-parents, parents or kids do; this is their choice. This will keep you from being overwhelmed with problems. Your responsibility is to have a good impact on other people (see Helping Doesn’t Cost a Dime). 

When you feel like problems are piling up like a gigantic mountain, stop thinking. Your mind is a battlefield. Everything you allow into it, will impact your actions. There is a word for things that we make up in our minds and that are not reality: mythomania. When you understand that everything that happens in your mind comes from yourself, you get up and go for a walk before you destroy yourself with negative words that will turn into negative attitudes.

Do not do anything irreversible

There are moments when people can feel depressed. Most suicides happen in countries like Canada where it is dark and cold in winter but also in cities like Marseilles where the sun is very strong in summer. There will always be a weather excuse; you have to get used to it and prepare for it.

Everything we do has consequences, either good or bad. When you feel depressed, you will tend to be attracted by bad things – such as smoking, alcohol, or even worse. I recently read that Angelina Jolie used to cut herself when she was a teenager because people were mocking her and she felt it was the only way for her to get rid of that hurt. A lot of teenagers around the world are being bullied. Doing sometimes terrible things will not take the problem away, quite the contrary, it will make it even worse, and you might lose even more. Don’t do it!

Remember that 10 years from now, these problems will not matter anymore if you stop them from ruining your present life. You choose how something or someone will have power over you.

Look around 

I have seen a lot of pain in my life, but the most beautiful thing I noticed is that those who suffered the most made their way to be the happiest people on earth. No one has a still and quiet life. Some people just handle fate remarkably well.

When you feel down, go outside. You probably think that you are the only person on earth who goes through it. Well, people you see in the streets are those who already have a good life. There are hundreds of thousands of people staying at home because they are scared or ashamed.

Write a letter

In moments of dispair, go help someone else. It will really help you to see life from another angle, from the angle that life is precious – don’t waste it!

I want to share with you a website where you can help other people: www.thea21campaign.org/content/write-a-letter/gjj5ex. The A21 organization works against human trafficking. Which words would you write to someone from whom freedom was robbed?